Lots of shit going on, very personal shit. There was very, very bad feeling between Simon (Gallup) and Boris (Williams) which was later turned on me. The atmosphere within the group was terrible. It was shot long after the end of the tour in January 1990 I think. I have probably blanked it out, as it was such a bad memory. I had all but forgotten about “Pictures Of You”. Its music video shows the band in the snow dressed in winter clothing as it is revealed they are actually in the tropics surrounded by palm trees, a concept also found in their 1987 b-side “Snow In Summer”. The lyrics continue the atmospheric imagery of “Plainsong”, tying in the theme of rain. Smith believes it was taken in Scotland in 1981 while on holiday. The photo on the cover of the song’s single is the same one used as the cover of “Charlotte Sometimes”, just not heavily distorted. It must also be taken into consideration that Smith confessed to Smash News in 1985 that he lies to interviewers because “I bore myself if I don’t make things up.” However, the name Myra Poleo is an anagram of his wife’s maiden name Mary Poole, and no such poem has been found to exist.
Yet another tale, found in the liner notes for the band’s compilation album Galore, Smith wrote that the song was “loosely based on an essay by Myra Poleo entitled The Dark Power of Ritual Pictures – after reading it I destroyed all my old ‘personal’ photographs, and almost all of my ‘home’ cine and video collection – I think I was trying to wipe away my past… within days I was suffering great regret I still am!” Another story is that he once threw away all of his personal photos and home movies. One is that it was written after a fire at Smith’s house and he found pictures of his wife, Mary Poole in the wreckage – so the song was written in response to his nostalgia. Smith has given different stories about what inspired the song. It reached the top 30 in the UK and Germany, and was a minor hit in the US and The Netherlands. After all, if you’re constantly telling yourself that you’re powerless or unattractive, you eventually will become both.“Pictures Of You” is the fourth and final single released from Disintegration. Such toxic affirmations drain your energy and leave you forever dissatisfied. You’ll start to see others as better and more appealing than you, even when it’s not even true. These negative internal voices shape your self-image and the way you see yourself and others. Low self-esteem and self-slander are the major driving forces of all forms of depression. You’ll be surprise how much better you’ll feel. Reward yourself, treat yourself, and give yourself the attention and TLC you crave. You’re no fun to be around you don’t enjoy work or play and you drag others down with you. When you neglect yourself, everyone suffers. Find out what that unresolved part of your history is that you keep replaying. Without insight, we get trapped in a repetitive cycle and repeat the same problem over and over again.
The most common themes I hear in my office include: I’m always the outsider I can’t trust anyone and Nobody understands me. This is most often a repetition of early experiences in your life. Look for a common theme in your depression, one that repeats itself. Is there a problem in one of your relationships? Is there something at work that is unsettling you? Unaddressed conflicts cause chronic psychological stress and are fundamental to many forms of depression. Here’s a list of the most common situations that often trigger depression:
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